Friday, April 17, 2015
We have many ways of suppressing our emotions, and Pluto Retrograde is going to bring them all back into the Light for us to examine, over the next 5 months.
We've suppressed the feminine for so long that sometimes we are not sure how to feel or express our emotions. We've been bullied and shamed for being emotional, for crying, for "wearing our hearts on our sleeves", for so long, that we live in fear of displaying any sort of emotion.
I suppressed my own emotions for many years, so much so that I did not even have words to express them. I had to not only relearn the lingo, but also had to relearn what each emotion felt like in my body. And sometimes, it's hard to express what you are feeling. It takes time, time to dig around inside yourself, to seek out that fleeting thought, that hidden emotion. And it can be painful to do so, all of the old wounds opened up, and then we sit there, crying our eyes out, once again in fear of being shamed for feeling. Yet, it has to be done, we have to keep digging, until we work through them all, one by one, day after day, recognizing that we are a feeling person, a person with feelings, a person who wants to share what they feel, and then teach ourselves how to do that, too. It's a process, sometimes painful, sometimes happy, sometimes something to just get through so that we can move on to something better, a better way, a better life.
Anger is the way that emotion is expressed by our masculine side, and sometimes, there's nothing wrong with that, sometimes it's the only way our emotions can be expressed, especially when they concern our childhood. Those can be deep traumatic wounds, and those trapped emotions need to come out, and anger can be a part of it, so can tears, pain, sadness, and more. And that's okay. Learning to accept our emotions is part of this process, and anger is one of them.
Anger is most often directed towards others. This is how we spill our emotions out all over other people, instead of realizing that when we are angry, we are really angry at ourselves, and digging in there, and trying to understand why we might be angry at ourselves is much more difficult than it is to blame others. Learning to accept responsibility for our feelings, is another part of the process. At some point, you have to stop blaming others.
Our masculine side expresses emotions through anger, aggression, and violence. Our feminine side expresses emotions through love, compassion, and empathy - and these can be directed at the self, as well as towards others.
Sometimes, all we can do is to ask ourselves what we are feeling. What am I feeling right now? Let me sit on that for just a minute. Compassion for all living beings. Love. Happiness, deep down, along with some sadness, as well. It makes me sad to see people suffering, especially when it is because they won't allow themselves to feel their true emotions. It makes me sad to see the things we do to this planet, harming our first Mother. I feel for all of life, I feel their pain, and it saddens me. I think we have to ask ourselves if the way we treat our planet, is the way we feel towards those who try to nurture us, take care of us, protect us, and if so, why? Are we denying that we want to be nurtured? That we deserve to be nurtured? Nurturing is a part of our feminine side, it is what mothers do for their young. To deny this, is to deny the feminine.
We need to feel our emotions in order to feel our connection to the Earth, and to all living things. We need to open our hearts in order to feel compassion, empathy, and love - real love. So it's all about learning to feel our emotions again, and giving ourselves permission to feel.
At the same time, we have to have balance - balance between our masculine and our feminine sides. We must not only feel, but also think. We need to begin to process things through both our hearts and our heads. Our masculine side teaches us how to move forward, be innovative, stretch who we are. Our feminine side teaches us how to be open to receive, not just from others, but also from the Universe itself, from All of Life. Our emotions are a direct link to living in Oneness with All of Life.
Every living being on this planet is here to help us in some way, to teach us, to provide for us, to heal us... and we cannot hear their voices if we cannot hear our own emotions. That's the trick, if there is one, to allow ourselves to be open to hearing both within and without. To be able to sink down into ourselves so far that we can hear our own thoughts, our own emotions, understand how others are feeling, show compassion towards others and towards ourselves, and to be so very quiet and still that the birds land right next to you, not realizing that you are a danger to them, for in that state, you are not. This is a state of still awareness I speak of, and we find it by processing our own emotions until we have elimated the ones that make us angry, through healing them, and this makes for a more content being, a stiller soul, one who can allow others to be as they are, and when we learn to do that, we can allow All of Life to be as it is, accepting it all, loving it all, having compassion for it all, and this leads us to open the door to being as One with All of Life.
Confused? Let me tell you a story of how "miracles" appear in my life. Several times during each day, I go outside, and sit in stillness. Listening, reflecting, just being, tuning out the noise, and any distracting thoughts. It's a form of meditation, only I do it outside, fully aware and awake. Answers I have been seeking may come to me during this time, new ideas may come, or I may see some Sign that gives me the answer or lesson or message that I need. Just yesterday, I saw two Marsh Hawks, while I was sitting outside. They were an answer to something I had been pondering. Hawk is a messenger from Spirit, and I always know that when I see Him, there are messages coming through and I need to pay attention in order to spot them. Spirit was hearing my ponderings and sent a Messenger. Birds are popular messengers, for they are readily available, anywhere on the planet, to be sent to you to bring you the answer or message that you need. Yet, anything can be a Messenger, a Sign. Number sequences tell you that the Angels are working with you, helping you to achieve your goals. Pecans can be Signs, as can an Oak Leaf, or a Pinecone, or a Snake or Snake hole, or a flock of unusual birds in the sky, or a sentence in a book or movie... Signs are everywhere and we miss them because we are so busy thinking about other people and their problems, or blaming our problems on other people, trapped in our heads, not feeling our hearts or emotions... we get lost in the everyday mundane world, and stop seeing the Signs.
To heal our emotions, to be able to express them, if only to ourselves so that we can continue to heal, is one sure way to begin to open that door to the Unseen World again, to begin noticing these Signs from Spirit that will guide you on your path. Connecting to the Earth is something else we can do to deepen our connection to All of Life. Daily prayer is something else that can be done... yet all of these will not help you if you are not willing to look deeply inside yourself and fix what is broken there so that you can see this world through unbiased eyes.
To feel our way through life, we must return to our hearts, and to a more heart-based way of thinking. This will open our eyes to All of Life and help us to live in harmony with its energies all the time. To experience these little reminders from Spirit is to know that we live in a world filled with magick and miracles. It is to live a life connected to everyone and everything, and to know that you are on the right path, and to have the support that you need in your life at all times, it is to know your Medicine and your gifts and express them in this world, with love and support from the Universe. It is to be in tune with the Universal Energies. To feel your way through life is to truly know life, and enjoy every moment of it by living your life to the fullest. And we can't do that when we are trapped in fear and anger. We can only do it by working through those denser emotions and finding the love that lies at the center of the Universe, once more.
It all begins with learning to love yourself, and healing your love for yourself. And that begins with feeling your emotions.
Let me ask you now, What are you feeling? Can you honor that feeling by giving it a name? I think you can.